"One Day in my Life at Work" by P. Jason King

6:00AM - Awake, take a shower, get dressed, and proceed to drive into Manhattan (for our Readers around the globe I am referring to New York City). My home is exactly 7 miles from my office. Not Bad, Huh? Wrong, first I must deal with the "Stupid People" who actually drive…then I am always the one pulled over by the police because I have a "vanity" license plate that they don't comprehend. So why not pull me over to ask me?

7:00AM - Normally, I'd be on the L.I.E. (Long Island Expressway), a/k/a "the largest parking lot in the world". If I wasn't pulled over (3 times this month), I could actually be drinking coffee in my office by 7:30AM. But now, it is already 7:20AM, it will take me 30-40 minutes to arrive at my office.

8:00AM - Start of my workday. First, have to take off my e-mails and make sure all Web Applications & Resumes have loaded properly. You should know that I do check our computer system at least 100 times over the weekend.

8:30AM - I still can't believe that when our web site, or anyone else's, says CLICK ONLY ONCE, there are still people who can't wait, so they click many times. It is like the "Yutz" at the elevator who keeps pressing the button. It won't make the elevator arrive any faster, but it feels good!!! Right? Of course it does!

9:30AM - Can't wait till our new software enhancements are completed, this is because I have to now Delete 22 of the same application someone submitted…this has to be an "officer" of "The Stupid Club".

10:00AM - My first appointment, late!!! Now, not that I am a VIP or anything, but based on my schedule, it generally takes 6-8 weeks to "land" an appointment with me. I always remind people to call if they are running late or, of course, if they have to cancel.

10:30AM - Still no phone call.

10:31AM - On to another project…Might as well make some follow-up phone calls. Ever find any "Live" people when you make a phone call? I mean a real person versus Voice Mail. I HATE VOICE MAIL!!! But what I hate even more than VM is a VM system that doesn't allow you to go where you need to go! Ok, well I will try them later, maybe the VM system will break down…

11:30AM - Still didn't receive phone call from "you know who".

11:31AM - A few months ago I did a "story" about how bad our DSL service was from Bell Atlantic, in fact Crain's NY did a story about my story and many others. Well, because of my problem, and only my problem, a New Company was formed called Verizon. And the day it was announced the phone company went on strike. Woe is me…we lost 14 Fax Lines, still have crossed lines, T1 lines slowed down a lot, too. So, although the strike in NYC is over and my assistant has called them everyday, I decide to try to make a call…What a true waste of time. All I spoke to were people who I have to send an application for "The Stupid Club".

12:30PM - Normal people may look at a menu to order something for lunch, I don't need to do this…just need a 10mg Valium.

12:31PM - Have a telephone interview scheduled. This was confirmed over 2 weeks ago. This is a very important process.

12:32PM - All set to call, pre-scheduled time is 12:35PM, not 12:30, 12:35.

12:35PM - Paper & Pen in hand, dial the number, "Sorry this number has been temporarily disconnected". GREAT…someone who didn't pay his phone bill.

12:36PM - You would think he would have called me…Hey, I am starting to get a complex.

1:00PM - Appointment with Web Designer, not our "regular person", but a Special One who works with Vector IV & Vector V, since we are building a new web site. He's gotta show, because I am supposed to go over his agreement with him and give him a retainer…so we know he's gotta be here. I pre-warned him that I have never met a "Creative" person who has ever showed up on time, so he promises to be the first.

1:15PM - Oh No!!! He hasn't shown. I'm going on the web to see if any new messages are there. He is on my "Buddy List", not for long however. I send him an "IM" (Instant Message), he says "Hold On" and says he will call me immediately…he never does. Hey, I don't think "TSC" has a web designer…I should send him an application.

1:30PM - Checked my e-mail and other stuff on the web, more repeat applications, others who send their resume without their name…I swear I am telling you the truth!!! You can't make this stuff up!!!

2:00PM - My 2 o'clock appointment has shown up! Yippeeee!!! She is asked to fill out an application, which is required, and which she was told about when the appointment was made.

2:20PM - My Receptionist informs me that she must be ready since she has stopped writing. As I approach my door to walk out to greet her, my receptionist rings me back - she has taken the form to bring in to me and noticed that is wasn't filled out. She had asked my appointment to kindly fill out all questions. Ms. Appointment refused!

2:21PM - I go out, introduce myself, shake hands, and say, "I understand you have a problem filling out our application." Ms. Appointment tells me it has too many questions - she doesn't want to fill in her name or address.

2:22PM - I explain, as I did previously when setting up the appointment, that the application is a requirement. She gives me the finger and leaves! What a lady!

2:23PM - What a wonderful day I'm having!!! Just another typical day in the life of Jason King.

2:24PM - I decide to visit the rest room.

2:25PM - Have to send a memo to the purchasing department - order bathroom tissue!!! NOW!

2:26PM - Catch up on correspondence.

3:00PM - Is it time to go home, yet?

3:01PM - Have to take a conference call (people I'm speaking to want something I can't deliver, so I try to end the call ASAP, but they want to tell their lives stories).

3:17PM - Finally off that damn phone call! You know who hasn't called yet???

3:30PM - Meeting with staff. A new staff member TELLS me she's leaving early! Diplomatically I explain, "You don't TELL me - you ask me if you may leave early."

4:00PM - I decide it's a bit slow, so maybe I can actually leave on time tonight!

5:00PM - The S _ _ T!!! hits the fan!!! Every client I've been trying to speak with all week, calls!!! And every one of them needs MY help now!!!

10:00PM - FINALLY ready to go home. Oh, Boy! I get to do this all over again tomorrow!

PS - I forgot to tell you that I asked for a quote from Dell Computers and a really good quote was e-mailed. I wanted to speak with someone in sales, but the e-mail didn't have a phone number…so, I e-mailed and asked to have someone call me. After 5 e-mails, I got a reply that my Sales Rep would be calling. No call. Good company! Many Charter Members of TSC !!!

PPS - Know any people who should join? TheStupidPeopleClub.com